By Lillian Gren
The Milking Cat: Your Favorite Teen Comedy Magazine (We Are Real People)
Welcome to The Milking Cat—the teen lit magazine that’s as unpredictable as your mood swings and twice as chaotic. Founded in 2018 by teens who were probably too caffeinated and inspired by a weird dream about a cat with an agenda, The Milking Cat has rapidly grown into a literary force that refuses to conform to society’s rules. (Or any rules, really.)
Meet our Mascot, Tucker!
We feature everything from gritty short stories about your definitely questionable life choices to poetry that might just make you cry (laughing!). And don’t get us started on the art. Think sketchy doodles, King George hinge profiles, and some truly questionable mixed media with too many fingers on the hands.
What Makes Us Different?
We Take Risks: If we’re not making you second-guess your entire existence, we’re doing it wrong. From exploring the ethics of immortal lobsters and high praise for Chinese restrooms, The Milking Cat has something for you. You’ve probably never read a magazine quite like this—and that’s exactly the point.
We’re Not Afraid of Cats (Or Milk): The name The Milking Cat came to us during an all-night brainstorming session fueled by pizza, bad decisions, and, well, milk. It’s random, it’s unexpected, and it’s here to stay. Much like your favorite weird aunt’s life advice.
We Are The Voice of "Whatever" Teens Everywhere: Whether you're writing your high school breakup story, dissecting the complexities of your TikTok addiction, or just looking for a place to express how deeply you feel about pineapple on pizza (we’re neutral on this), The Milking Cat has a seat at the table for you.
Meet the Creators (They’re Probably Weirder Than You Think):
Isla Garcia (Editor-in-Chief): The mastermind behind The Milking Cat, Isla is a self-proclaimed “mood-swing poet” who sometimes uses a pencil as a magic wand to summon words. Her hobbies include daydreaming, fighting the patriarchy, and trying to figure out how cats manage to look so smug all the time.
Liam Porter (Creative Director): Liam is the reason our magazine doesn’t look like it was put together by a group of caffeine-fueled raccoons. When he’s not designing the magazine, he’s probably making memes or attempting to create art so avant-garde even the art world doesn’t understand it.
Zara Patel (Managing Editor): Zara’s the one who actually makes sure everything doesn’t fall apart (no promises, though). She’s got a sharp eye for detail, a love for juicy gossip, and an unhealthy obsession with true crime podcasts. Her motto? “If you’re not overthinking it, you’re doing it wrong.”
Niko Chen (Poetry Editor): Niko’s the poet who’s probably writing sonnets about the injustice of waiting for your Wi-Fi to reconnect. He’s also a firm believer that every teen should write a love letter to their favorite snack at least once (ours is milk). You’d be surprised how therapeutic it can be.
So, if you’re looking for a literary space where you can let your creativity run wild, The Milking Cat is here for you—whether you’re into serious comedy or just want to know what happens when you combine weird metaphors with milk. (Spoiler: It’s amazing.)
In short, The Milking Cat is definitely the coolest thing to hit your inbox. Probably. But don’t take our word for it—check it out yourself.
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